It took me 30 minutes to figure out what I wanted to eat this morning.
Right after I decided I wasn’t going to go to the yoga studio and that I wasn’t in the mood to work out my attention was drawn to breakfast – the fridge is nearing emptiness, the resources are begging for resourcefulness – what do I want? To feed myself, I determined.
I have one goal for this post and that is: taking time to make a decision, even an imperfect one, reveals the beauty of our thought process & our choices, including the odd ones. Our choices reveal the contents of our mind – what we create from our thinking. Just like thoughts lead to feelings and feelings to actions we get caught in judging the idea which results in judging the outcome and ultimately judging ourselves. So what happens when you stop judging all together?
I believe that’s the fun of healing.
soy chai latte, leftover peach/chia waffle & blueberry cheerios with banana and blueberries (they’re underneath)
with a little peanut butter…
I made this roughly 1.5 – 2 hours after breakfast. The judge creeps in: “but I only ate a couple hours ago, how could I be hungry? Am I eating from emotional hunger? What if my diet is insufficient? What am I doing wrong? It must be me!” Rather than, “wow my hunger is such a curious animal – what is it asking for? What do I want now, maybe I can find something that would satisfy this extra hankering?” Do you see the difference? Curiosity is KING.
Every time I “eat more” or “eat a lot” I’m reminded that what I do eat takes conscious thought and rarely am I making a knee-jerk reaction (ever). If I compare how I eat now to how I ate when I was younger I congratulate myself; leaps and bounds! Can you acknowledge yourself too?
I invite you to take some very conscious steps inward.
Slow way down. Don’t question yourself as much as you might question the instructions you’re heeding. Which is easier said than done right? Because you’ve spent so much of your life identifying with the instructions you’ve been following – but I’m here to remind you that whatever word you’ve been taking as god is similar to the biblical text that’s veered so many off their personal path. If you feel something is off, you’re probably right. But if you assume you’re off (wrong, bad, not enough etc), you’re wrong! Sometimes its not you OR the diet, it’s just your perception.
Busyness tends to propel us 10 feet forward and put the conditioned mind before the subtle body. That’s ok. The next chance you get or the first time-out of your day (maybe reading this post) center yourself, take this reminder with you in your car, a restaurant, your kitchen or at the store.
Remember that you’re highly impressionable and to forgive yourself.
You cannot make a wrong decision.
If it helps: create a list of limitations so you can find what freedom exists outside of that. For me, choosing to eat plant based (no meat, dairy) & gluten-free gives me such a wide range of things I can choose from to so when I do open my mouth I feel like a kid in a candy shop – always excited!
Maybe it appears that I’m eating a lot of food and sometimes it feels that way, but what I’m really doing is preventative work. The little prevention I do on the front end lends massive rewards on the back end. Rather than hyper fixate on 3 perfect square meals a day, ex: oatmeal, salad with protein and stir fry with rice (sounds “so perfect” right?!?): I focus on what measures I can take now to be present with my desires so my desires don’t over accumulate to the point of an explosion.
What does that look like? Kinda what you see above. A little of this, a bit of that – a few breaths in between and back to work.
Keeping in mind that everyday looks different. Acknowledge the little things you’ve done that have created a ripple effect, it all makes a difference. Even just reading this post shows that you’re open to seeing yourself in a new light. I have a feeling that whatever you took from it will express itself later on in your day/week.
Sending warmth, calm and peace – xo
